counseling, Insecurity

We are not defined by our labels

We live in a society of labels. We are often stamped with letters from A to Z based on our issues. I used to think I was controlled by my anxiety, broken childhood and depression that would plague my days. For years things felt hopeless. I used to assume I would never be free. I would have night after night of sleeplessness, laying there consumed with every possible fear and out come. I would meet those who were not bound by the same things and watch in envy. How could they walk so freely? Did they receive the lucky genes? Where were mine? I never asked for the broken shattered pieces that I was handed and sure did not want them. For so long it felt absolutely hopeless and the more I thought about it the more hopeless I became. This was now my life. Anxiety. Depression. Insecurity. I would have given anything to remove the weights I carried. I no longer wanted these companions. I was angry with God. I guess the one good thing I did is, I told Him. I remember a distinct moment in my life where I was laying on the floor weeping to the point where my chest hurt and body ached. I could cry no more. I gave God an ultimatum. Show up or my pursuit of goodness and truth was over. I honestly believe that is the point where my life began to change, in the most miraculous way. Mind you at this point I had given my life to the Lord 15 or more years prior. If you were to ask my friends I was ALL IN with my life with the Lord. So my struggle was not due to my lack of church attendance or Bible reading. At this point in my life and the only way to explain it is a supernatural habit changing work happened. I believe that in changing a person’s life it is multifaceted. It is not just changing or breaking a habit. It is also not memorize more of this scripture or that scripture. It’s a divine work spiritually, physically and mentally. Working on a person as a whole. God started my journey that day and I followed in obedience. I still am amazed to this day because much of what the Lord had me do at the time, I learned while working on my Master’s years later, are proven techniques on how to help people. The companions I used to carry are no longer with me. I have my moments of anxiety here and there but I call them for the lies that they are. The labels are no longer carried around. If you struggle or if you know someone who does encourage them to get some help. There are some amazing counselors out there, find one. If you are local contact me or a counselor in this area. Blessings.