Lately I have been thinking about my marriage and how where we are now is far from where I thought we would be. My husband and I partially wrote our own vows. I did not want the traditional vows but desired something unique to our situation. Sadly I must confess that I do not remember all of our vows but one part stands out in my mind. I had vowed that I would follow my husband in all God calls us to do. At the moment I pictured holding his hand along our journey and following the great cloud by day and fire by night (Old Testament reference). At that moment I had an idea in my mind of what I desired for our marriage, the path we would take and my plan of how big I desired our family to be… but I never planned for the struggles or the secret baggage that was hidden somewhere deep inside. Do not get me wrong I knew we would have disagreements and hard days. At the moment I never thought that God was going to come in and completely strip us down to nothing and rebuild. I never thought we would have a season in our marriage where we both doubted if we would make it through. Life has hit hard. We have had moments where we honestly despised the other one breathing. The pain seeping from both of our hearts had begun to cloud and there was no like for each other. Pain from our past, pain from the moment and pain from even looking at the future. Looking around there was no ounce of hope for improvement. We found ourselves in an unknown land, with no support and almost penniless. There are no words for the tears that were shed or the weeping that took place in the dark hours of the night. I have seen that it has made our relationship more beautiful than ever. I also saw the point where most marriages never make it through. I too had almost given up. I could no longer fault any person for being at that point because everything had begun to look absolutely hopeless from where we stood. It was a God orchestrated season. We stood in a place that God had called us to. We were there out of obedience. At first I was angry with the Lord how could he call us to the place where everything almost fell apart.
God allowed a complete stripping of everything in order to rebuild us into something more magnificent than we could have dreamed or asked for. At the moment we vowed our lives to each other and the Lord remained faithful to our vows. I can say that His plan was far greater. He continues to rebuild and shape who we are. I have no desire to walk this season again but I praise Him for it. I know there is more ahead and my perspective about our future has definitely changed. I am able to praise Him for the difficulty.
My husband and I both desire to walk alongside other couples and provide support as they walk their journey. If you ever need prayer or support feel free to contact us. Starting the beginning of 2016 we plan on starting our marriage coaching together and helping other couple’s in strengthening their marriages. So stay tuned for more information. Blessings to you!